Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The Unicorn's Tale

Dabboo was really happy today…it was his quadrentryrt today …and at last he was an adutryrt!...he looked at his reflection in the pool … another few tryrtyrt years and he would be a fully grown unicorn . He couldn’t stop admiring his horn in the reflection had grown to it’s full size …the real sign of an adutryrt!. His mother came up to him and wished him a Happy Quadrentryrt! “But you must behave like a grown up now, Dabboo”,she said . “No more trying to wander off into the Forbidden Forest all by yourself!” Dabboo smiled to himself . He had always been fascinated by the Forbidden Forest ever since he was a mere yountrytrt of an unicorn ! …he had tried to slip in a few times before , but had always been caught by the keepers. But now things were different adutryrt ,with the help of his horn had the ability to turn invisible at will, albeit for a short time ! Dabboo decided to celebrate his quadrentryrt by exploring the Forbidden Forest !! ..he would slip in pass the keepers by turning invisible..…after all what could be there that everyone avoided it ??...he had asked the elders but had only been told not to meddle his horn into grown up affairs !! But he was a grown up now..technically at least!! He was still to pass his Qwetyrt to be considered an adutryrt …it consisted of several tasks he had to complete before the elders were satisfied that Daboo was mature enough to be declared an Qwetyrt Adutryrt. And as his mother kept on reminding Dabboo, wanting to venture into the Forbidden Forest would certainly not please the elders !! Dabboo promised himself that this would be the first and last time in the Forbidden Forest. After this he would settle down as a responsible adutrytrt and be a model unicorn! Dabboo concentrated hard on the tip of his horn and wished to be invisible . It was the first time he was doing it and it took some time . Then he felt a warm sensation all over . He looked at his reflection in the pool …the blue sky stared back at him . “I’ve done it ..I am invisible!!”,thought Dabboo ! He was through the keepers and into the Forbidden Forest in an instant . Suddenly the warm sensation ebbed away . Dabboo realized that he was visible once again . He broke into a trot as he realized he was finally in the Forbidden Forest !! .He looked around but could’nt make out any difference out here compared to the Forest he lived in . Trust the elders to make a big deal about the Forbidden Forest !! Suddenly he heard a loud noise . He turned around instantly towards the source of the sound . Dabboo couldn’t believe what he saw …but how was it possible ?? … he had read about these creatures in his mythology books ...and off course everyone knew they didn’t exist !! . Dabboo poked himself with his horn to see if he was dreaming . But the creature was still there all it’s ugliness ! Dabboo moved towards the creature when it suddenly gave out another loud noise and went further inside the forest emitting noises as it went ! . Suddenly Dabboo heard someone coming his way . Expecting to see the creature again Dabbo turned behind , only to see his father coming up with a most unpleasant look . His father bellowed in anger “How dare you come into the Forbidden Forest…and that too that you are an adutryrt now??”Dabboo was so scared that he meekly followed his father out of the Forbidden Forest , forgetting to tell all about the creature he saw . And seeing the temper his father was in , Dabboo decided to keep shut ! His father would be the last person to believe about the creature he saw in the Forest ! Dabboo went back home and had to swear that he would never go inside the Forbidden Forest again ! . Later when things had cooled down Dabboo told his mother “You won’t believe what I saw in the Forbidden Forest was a…”he whispered the name of the creature lest his father overheard him speaking about such things . Dabboo’s mother laughed and told him “Don’t be silly Dabboo …grow up !!..there are no such things as Humans”

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

The Perfect Man

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away there lived the perfect girl, or at least that’s what she thought she was. And it was obvious that she wouldn’t settle for anything less than the perfect man wasn’t it? So she went on spurning suitors, who were numerous …it was natural I guess...Some were attracted by her looks, some by her wit, and some by the size of her father’s bank account. While her best friends got married and pregnant, though not necessarily in the same order, she waited patiently for her perfect man to come. And then she met him. Like in all good old love stories, she hated the sight of him at first. Then as she got to know him better she found out that he wasn’t a bad sort at all .In fact to her surprise she found that she quite liked spending time with him. As time went on she began to ask herself whether he was the man she was waiting for. She began to look out for any faults he might have …she had to be careful …she wouldn’t settle for anything less than a perfect man , and she was willing to wait for some more time if she had to. But her fears went unproved and after a few weeks she was sure that he was as perfect as a man could get. Now she was convinced that he was the perfect man she had been looking for all her life, she decided to broach the topic of love by casually asking him whether he wanted to remain single all his life. He smiled, looked straight into her eyes and replied “Well... I’m still looking for the perfect man”

(Written on 22/11/2002…Mumbai)

The Meeting

I woke up thinking about her . Again . The same thing had been happening daily for over the past one month now . Maybe it is natural , maybe it’s not , I don’t know . I guess everyone feels the same way I did, sometime or the other in their lives .
As I dressed, I looked at her picture stuck by the mirror . I smiled at it . I knew I would be meeting her today --Our first meeting . She herself hadn’t actually agreed to meet me or anything , but today I was determined to meet her . No more watching her from behind the bushes or waiting outside her apartment to catch a glimpse of her . She was going to her farmhouse today and I would meet her there .
I may be a total stranger to her , but she is not to me. God ! , to what lengths I have gone to know about her . For the past one month I had been running from place to place finding out what she liked , what she didn’t , where she liked to go , which was her favourite food , which perfume she likes wearing , who were her friends , who were not …Shit ..and God knows what not ! .
I left the house after some time and drove to her farm house , listening to “Love Story” as I went … It was her favourite track . On reaching my destination I was pleased to see that her car was parked by the house . Good ! This meant that she had already arrived . I parked my car next to hers .
I waited in the car till she came out of the house and proceeded towards her car . I got out of the car and stood in front of her . She seemed surprised to see me . I smiled at her , then I took out my gun and shot her through her eyes . As she fell to the ground in a pool of blood I spoke into my cell phone “The mark has been eliminated …. arrange for payments”


It was a cold and dark night . The streets were empty except for the one or two dogs howling at each other . The chilly wind knocked at the closed windows and doors sounding like a policeman on his beat . A man stepped out of the door of the building next to which I was standing . sensing a possible prey I followed the man as he started walking towards the main road .
It was dreadfully cold and I saw the man tighten his jacket and shiver as he fumbled in his pocket for a match to light the cigarette he had just taken out . I saw my opportunity and in a flash I was beside him . I held out my lighter towards him . He was at first surprised but then he lighted his cigarette , thanked me and asked “haven’t I seen you somewhere ?” . I smiled . Ever since my picture had come out in the papers I was getting recognized all over town . I moved out of the shade so that he could see me better . The man’s face changed . The cigarette dropped from his hand and he screamed aloud in fright . I took a ;last look at him as he fell to the ground and fainted .
As I moved away I glanced at the place where my forehead was . I sighed . Ever since the mugger had blown my brains off , I wasn’t the same handsome man I used to be .

Written in the English Language period in School...Class XI)

The Approach of Death

As Yukon III gained consciousness , he felt a searing pain in the abdominal region . He realized that the effect of the toxic gas was still lingering in the room .
Turning around he saw that his father had been crushed to death . Zeka VI was lying in front of him , most probably dead . Yukon III felt like crying . He couldn’t understand why the humans were so hell bent on their destruction . For generations the humans had been killing their tribe and most probably would continue doing so till either of them were completely wiped out .
Yukon III tried to move out of the room but couldn’t . The pain increased as he tried to move . Last month his mother had been killed , and now his father too was dead . “The humans are becoming more and more aggressive each day “ , he observed . Previously the attacks were few , once in a month or two , but now they were attacked nearly every week . Yukon III was feeling dizzy now . His sight was steadily diminishing , but he managed to observe that two humans had entered the room .
he tried to escape , but the humans were faster . Yukon III was crushed to death , like his father had bee , a short while ago . As life ebbed out of him Yukon III heard one of the humans say “ Bloody disgusting creatures ! … never liked on of ‘em roaches” .

(Written in class XI during the Math period in school ,13/XI/99)

Unnamed -11th March,2007

He had harbored a crush on her as long as he could think. She was the embodiment of everything he wanted in a girl. To him she was perfect in every manner possible. She was a free spirit; her zest for life excited him and left him breathless at the same time. Once when he has gone out with some common friends, someone had remarked that her partner would have trouble keeping up with her limitless enthusiasm. He had secretly made a silent prayer that someday he would be the one who would be with her. He knew it was futile to tell her directly that he liked her. A girl like that deserved the best, and he knew too well that she wouldn’t even give him a second glance. He tried telling himself that he was just being plain silly to even think of the girl .It didn’t work. As much as he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about her in the middle of the night. After getting drunk it was she whom he thought of first. And he was sad that he could never be with her.

The spaceship moved towards the star slowly but steadily. The crew was experienced and frankly so used to the procedure by now that they could have carried out the landing blindfolded. AlphaXIX was the best ship the Mersinontuans had built and could be relied upon to function even in the face of a nuclear attack. The crew was selected from the best in the Sunova galaxy and had undergone rigorous training for nearly five years before they were cleared for the mission. Their task was simple. To land on the star and come back with enough Ewenfullium to power the galaxy for a million more years. After all the entire star was totally made of Ewenfullium , and even a few pounds of the substance was more than enough of what they needed. The difficult part was that no ship had ever been able to go near the star without being reduced to ash. The Mersinontuans had toiled for seven long years before they could come up with a plan as to how they should build a ship that could withstand landing on the star and coming back safely with the Ewenfullium. Building the ship and testing it in laboratory conditions had taken 15 more years. After all, the few fragments of Ewenfullium that broke out of the orbit of the star and could be obtained by the Mersinontuans were few and far between, and replicating the destructive force of the star in a laboratory was tough even for the advanced science of the Mersinontuans. Millions of years of studying the galaxy seemed so futile when they were faced with the scarcity of Ewenfullium. Nothing seemed to work. And that’s when the Mersinontuans managed to create Asqauredm and Esquarev

He was falling for her with each passing day. He kept hoping he would meet her even if for a brief period of time. The smile on her face warmed him up instantly. He had never felt more at peace with himself than when he was with her. He dreaded letting her know in any way. She was a good friend, and he didn’t want to lose that in any way. He hoped to secretly keep on loving her and fade away when she was gone. At times he humored himself with the thought that they were together. Then he would come to his senses and berate himself for his pipe dreams.

The Mersinontuans created Asqauredm and Esquarev out of particles of Ewenfullium after years of research. The tests in the laboratory impressed even the most cynical of the Mersinontuan scientists. They were the only things apart from AlphaXIX that seemed to resist the destructive force of the Ewenfullium. The entire galaxy held their breath when the crew got into AlphaXIX for the first time and were subject to the force of the Ewenfullium in the laboratory. When they came out unscathed, the Mersinontuans realized that hey had perhaps saved the galaxy from extinction. Their own sun had died thousands of years back, and it was only through Ewenfullium that they could hope to energise the life on the galaxy. And Asqauredm and Esquarev were the perfect tools to dig the surface of the star and come back with the vital mineral that would save Sunova from extinction.

He went out on a trip with a group of friends one day. He was tremendously busy, but the fact that she was coming along seemed to make everything else meaningless. He wanted to be with her, talk to her, walk with her, breathe the same air as she was breathing. He was so much in love with her. The twinkle in her eyes when she laughed at his jokes made his life worthwhile. He loved her.

The commander of AlphaXIX opened the hatch as they moved in position over the star. Asqauredm and Esquarev were gently placed in the cosmobasket and pushed out towards the star. As they slowly made their descent, the crew crossed their fingers and hoped that the mission would be successful. Everything seemed to be proceeding peacefully till the time the cosmobasket entered the atmosphere of the star. Suddenly there was a blinding flash and the entire star became blue. The force of the explosion immediately reduced AlphaXIX and its crew to ash.

He woke up to see she was laying next to him. He had never seen her looking more beautiful. The blue morning light made her look more angelic than ever. He bent over and kissed her gently on the lips. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. A2 dm looked straight into her eyes and said “Eve, I never had the guts to tell you before, but I love you” E2v put her head on his shoulder and replied “I love you too Adam”

Friday, April 04, 2008

the scent

"Then I fall to my knees
I grow weak, I go slack
As if she captured the breath of my
Voice in a bottle
And I cant catch it back"
-She Moves On, Paul Simon

The whiff of the perfume handed by the sales executive at the swanky mall takes me back several years. I don't need to see the name of the brand. It's etched in my mind. Just like the smell was for a good number of years. My knees start trembling. I politely tell her I will come back later and walk out for a good lungful of smoke. I need it badly. The nicotine spreading through my veins gradually pacifies the tornado in my head.

Long after the bottle was over, I used to smell the cap just to hold on to those memories. Venus was close to the Earth that time I remember. Just one of those random things that comes back to mind all of a sudden. I can suddenly smell the gun powder and hear the staccato of a machine gun burst in the background somewhere once more.

I smile to myself as I sit in the cab that will take me home. The sudden surge of emotions vanished as quickly as they had emerged. I will never forget the name of the brand ever. Was very apt for what I had experienced then. Those were different times, I was a different person.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Heights of Desperation !

Pant taa khule haathey elo likhtey giye kobita
Bishon-i shaala demanding, aamar-ei hobby taa
Tobou cheshta chaliye jaachi only one thing bhebhey
Kono maagi impressed hoye lagatey aamai debey !

(Translated below just for the sake of translation ! )

The pants they come undone in the effort to write verse
It's really demanding this hobby of mine perverse
Still I carry on with the thought that my efforts will get paid
Some hot chick will get impressed and I will get laid !

An ode to Chosnee - By Jhontu Das, B.Com (IInd division), Bardhaman

oh chosneeee my laaabhly lil brat
i hope u have killed that pesky rat
warna let me come carrying my gun
i bheel hunt it for you oh my sanaam

i bheel put my life in danger, tere liye
aaab to maan jaa ... kor mujhse biye
from bardhaman i will take a local train
I hope my efforts bheel not go in vain

Bhen you come wearing that red sari
Over you para-r chokras will start maramari
I bheel become tornado and save you fom them
Shotti bolcchi Chosnee... this is called Prem !

You call me "O Go shuncho", I will call you "Tumi"
When bheel you marry me, just sei din gulo guni
You are my shorshe... i will be your ilish maach
I will be your song... you will be my baliye naach

amar shundori Chosnee....I am making propose
I dont habh any money, warna bhejta ek lal rose
Kiney debo lal chiruni,fitey and lipisteek tokey
Please maan jaa chosnee... marriage ke liye say O.k !!

(with due apologies to non bongs... in all modesty, the effect is lost in translation :P )